November Chill

It’s November, but I’m not that chill…

Happy November, everyone!

Is anyone taking part in NaNoWriMo this year? The annual November novel-writing challenge has been beckoning me and throwing a little bit of pressure my way. I tried doing it last year and it proved to have the opposite effect of “motivating” me. Instead of feeling inspired to write a couple thousand words each day, I felt “off task” and “behind” if I followed any other writing ideas or tended to other responsibilities. I could post “wow! Awesome! Great job! Keep going,” messages in my NaNoWriMo groups, but that looming word count badge? It was brutal and constantly made me feel shamed.

People that successfully write 50,000+ words during the challenge are called “winners” and last year I wrote about being a “NaNoWriMo Loser.” It was mostly in jest, but does share some feelings of inadequacy.

On reflection, it’s not unusual to have programs and organizations that you FULLY SUPPORT, but that just didn’t work for you. Just sitting with that thought, I can think of a number of such examples.

That’s not to say that NaNoWriMo might not be a wonderful undertaking in future years. Right now, however, my life is…

Chaotic

Overwhelming

Spiraling Out of Control

A Lot

Exhausting

I have to-do lists on top of piles of crap I need to put away, file, manage, mail, sell, send, read…